HEARTLAND USA
(…taking a springtime beating…)

Yes, the heartland is taking a springtime beating right now. It’s actually not that unusual for this time of year, but, it does seem a mite excessive…this time around.

From the Gulf Coast to upper Michigan and Minnesota, from the Tennessee hill country to the Dakotas, our midlands are being plagued with wild, wild, weather conditions. First, there were unusually late and heavy snow storms, followed by abnormal rainfalls causing lots of flash-flooding all over the place (dry as dust Texas, after years of drought, receiving more than its fair share to make up for it); and, all of that topped off with a swarm of tornadoes, from relatively mini-sized ones to mega-sized humongous boomers roaring across the entire region in blitzkrieg fashion…ripping everything to shreds…and with no end in sight.

Well, it looks like Mother Nature has gone on a rampage to show us she’s extremely pissed off at the way we’ve been treating her lately (…either that…or Heaven’s two jolly pranksters, Michael and Gabriel, spiked her tea with “elixir” again…sending her of on this toot…bad archangels…bad archangels!).

All of which is enough to make us want to revert back to sacrificing a virgin or two to try and calm her down again…assuming we could find some in this day and age.

C’est la vie!

CENTURION

Cartoon Annex - Issue No. 49 - Jun 2013